The people with NOBAMA stickers on their car make me giggle. They remind me of the type of people who would proudly hang a banner at their son’s graduation exclaiming congraduations! That’s what I think of anyway, every time I see those stickers.
So this is exactly how I want 2010 to be for me:
twentyten from myfuckingeye on Vimeo.
Sometimes when I’m hanging out with Ken, I will randomly spout out what I’m sure are Chinese words that I have managed to pick up in the 8 and a half years of knowing him. Then I’ll badger him asking, “did I say anything, did I say anything?”
Usually the answer is a resounding no.
Then today while recalling a really funny episode of The Big Bang Theory, where Howard is teaching Sheldon to speak Chinese — I reenacted the scene using my own Chinese words. And I spoke real Chinese. I SPOKE CHINESE, albeit unintentional, but I spoke fucking Chinese!
My sentence: 4 dead is.
So I’m trilingual and a philosopher .
Awesome.
the one in our master bedroom ceiling fan. When Ken jumped on the bed to remove the cover–I stood below him waiting to see what kind of light bulb would be exposed so Id know what to look for in the basement. Turns out the ceiling fan had this odd light bulb, in the shape of a ring that was about 9 inches in diameter. I said, who the fuck decided it was cool to buy a ceiling fan that uses light bulbs that look like that? Where the fuck do we even buy a replacement?
Ken said, I imagine the same place where we bought the fan–home depot was it?
Always the rational one, whatever.
He climbed off the bed and said, hey Esthela, what do you think of this?
This being him holding the light bulb up to his nose like a nose ring. I laughed.
I said, thats funny, but what do you think of this? I took it from him and held it up to the corner of my eyebrow. He laughed.
He said, I guess thats pretty funny, but what do you think of this? He held it up to his crotch. I laughed.
I said, that is pretty hilarious, but what do you think of this? I held it up to my one of my nipples. He laughed.
He said, that is pretty funny, but what do you think of this? Then he picked Lily up, turned her over and attached it to one of her many nipples.
AND I FUCKING LAUGHED!
I keep telling her I’ll update when something interesting happens.
This isn’t enough for her, so I’ll update now that something insulting has happened.
1 Tip of a flat belly : - Fatburningfurnace.com - Cut down 3 lbs of your belly every week by keeping this 1 weird tip.
That is what an advertisement on the side of an email read within gmail.
In an email that included a picture of me.
Rude.
Me: Hey thanks for taking the initiative to do laundry without me asking.
Ken: Uh, right. Actually I just needed some of that stuff for my trip this weekend.
Me: Oh. Figures.
Ken: Well, I DID do some of your laundry too.
Me: Because you needed a big enough load to run the wash?
Ken: Nooo.. Because I was being nice!
—
Cut to today: I am selflessly doing laundry for both of us because it needs to be done–when I go to put the stuff I just washed into the dryer what do I find? All my clothes that were innocent bystanders of Ken’s selfish act where he only used my clothes to fill up the load, but left them there hung out to dry. Minus the hanging part.
Boys.
I worked Ken to the bone. Last year, before I moved away, we started painting the master bedroom. We got that and the master bath, but the sitting room was never finished. When I moved away, Ken took over what used to be my office–so now that I’m back I decided to turn our sitting room into my new office and now it needed to be finished. It’s where I’m at right now, it’s very nice and very yellow. This is after hours and hours of having Ken move furniture around, remove curtain rods, tape and paint and then repaint over missed areas. He was exhausted as he was still trying to adjust from his usual schedule of sleeping during the day.
I hardly helped, because I’m kind of useless like that.
When he went to Home Depot, because we ran out of paint, he wondered to himself if there would be a color difference in the new paint and the paint that was a year old. He decided he’d compare with the bit that he had on his fingers by grabbing a bit off the sample they use to indicate the color of paint on the lid of the can. When the paint guy pushed the can of paint across the counter towards Ken, he touched the still wet splash of paint, but because he was so fucking tired and so fucking out of it– he then instinctively brought the tip of his finger to his tongue to taste it.
Then he realized what he’d done.
Then he immediately felt stupid.
Then rather than explain he was too tired to have any idea why he’d done that he just said, “yup–that’s gold buttercup alright. Thanks.” Then grabbed the can of paint and walked off leaving the paint guy thinking that the only way Ken could verify the paint color was by tasting it.
And I just laughed out loud again thinking about this.